{"id":3125,"date":"2026-01-09T06:16:58","date_gmt":"2026-01-09T06:16:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/?p=3125"},"modified":"2026-01-09T06:17:44","modified_gmt":"2026-01-09T06:17:44","slug":"hom-nay-toi-da-lo-chuyen-bao-dong-va-can-thiep-de-ha-nhiet-mot-vu-xung-dot-ngay-tren-pho-cau-chuyen-cua-co-olga-nguyen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/2026\/01\/09\/hom-nay-toi-da-lo-chuyen-bao-dong-va-can-thiep-de-ha-nhiet-mot-vu-xung-dot-ngay-tren-pho-cau-chuyen-cua-co-olga-nguyen\/","title":{"rendered":"H\u00f4m nay t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 lo chuy\u1ec7n bao \u0111\u1ed3ng\u2026 v\u00e0 can thi\u1ec7p \u0111\u1ec3 h\u1ea1 nhi\u1ec7t m\u1ed9t v\u1ee5 xung \u0111\u1ed9t ngay tr\u00ean ph\u1ed1! – C\u00e2u chuy\u1ec7n c\u1ee7a c\u00f4 Olga Nguyen"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Today I managed to stick my nose into other people\u2019s business and de-escalate a conflict in the street. Want to know where? Want to know how? Read on. <\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

[English below]<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n

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B\u1ea1n c\u00f3 mu\u1ed1n bi\u1ebft chuy\u1ec7n x\u1ea3y ra \u1edf \u0111\u00e2u, v\u00e0 t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 l\u00e0m th\u1ebf n\u00e0o kh\u00f4ng? C\u00f9ng \u0111\u1ecdc ti\u1ebfp nh\u00e9!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

🏠 T\u00f4i s\u1ed1ng \u1edf S\u00e0i G\u00f2n, Vi\u1ec7t Nam. \u1ede \u0111\u00e2y, b\u1ea1o l\u1ef1c gia \u0111\u00ecnh v\u1eabn ch\u01b0a b\u1ecb coi l\u00e0 ph\u1ea1m ph\u00e1p. Theo tr\u1ea3i nghi\u1ec7m c\u1ee7a t\u00f4i, hi\u1ebfm khi c\u00f3 ai \u0111\u1ee9ng ra can thi\u1ec7p khi m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef b\u1ecb \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng b\u1ea1o h\u00e0nh. Trong v\u0103n h\u00f3a Vi\u1ec7t Nam, theo m\u00f4 h\u00ecnh ph\u00e2n c\u1ea5p quy\u1ec1n l\u1ef1c c\u1ee7a Hofstede, x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i ch\u1ea5p nh\u1eadn r\u1eb1ng ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u00f3 \u201c\u0111\u1ecba v\u1ecb cao h\u01a1n\u201d (\u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng, ch\u1ed3ng) c\u00f3 quy\u1ec1n \u201cd\u1ea1y d\u1ed7\u201d ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u00f3 \u201c\u0111\u1ecba v\u1ecb th\u1ea5p h\u01a1n\u201d (ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef, v\u1ee3). Th\u1ebf n\u00ean, \u0111\u00f4i khi b\u1ea1n s\u1ebd th\u1ea5y m\u1ed9t s\u1ed1 ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef \u0111i loanh quanh v\u1edbi \u0111\u00f4i m\u1eaft b\u1ea7m t\u00edm, v\u00e0 ng\u01b0\u1eddi ta n\u00f3i r\u1eb1ng h\u1ecd \u201c\u0111i \u0111\u1ee5ng v\u00e0o c\u1eeda\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

😔 T\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 ch\u1ee9ng ki\u1ebfn nh\u1eefng c\u1ea3nh \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng g\u1ea7m g\u1eeb, qu\u00e1t m\u1eafng ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef, th\u1eadm ch\u00ed \u00e9p h\u1ecd v\u00e0o g\u00f3c \u0111\u01b0\u1eddng. Khi tr\u00f2 chuy\u1ec7n v\u1edbi b\u1ea1n b\u00e8 t\u00f4i, c\u1ea3 ng\u01b0\u1eddi Vi\u1ec7t l\u1eabn ng\u01b0\u1eddi n\u01b0\u1edbc ngo\u00e0i, h\u1ecd c\u0169ng th\u1ea5y nh\u1eefng \u0111i\u1ec1u t\u01b0\u01a1ng t\u1ef1.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kh\u00f4ng ch\u1ec9 v\u1eady, v\u00ec s\u1ef1 ch\u00eanh l\u1ec7ch v\u1ec1 thu nh\u1eadp, s\u1ef1 t\u1ef1 do \u0111i l\u1ea1i, \u0111\u1ecba v\u1ecb x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i v\u00e0 th\u1eadm ch\u00ed l\u00e0 s\u1ef1 \u201cb\u1ea5t kh\u1ea3 x\u00e2m ph\u1ea1m\u201d tr\u01b0\u1edbc ph\u00e1p lu\u1eadt, kh\u00f4ng \u00edt \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng n\u01b0\u1edbc ngo\u00e0i \u1edf \u0111\u00e2y c\u0169ng mang theo t\u01b0 t\u01b0\u1edfng \u0111\u00f3, coi ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef Vi\u1ec7t Nam l\u00e0 \u0111\u1ed1i t\u01b0\u1ee3ng \u0111\u1ec3 \u00e1p \u0111\u1eb7t quy\u1ec1n l\u1ef1c c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh. T\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 ch\u1ee9ng ki\u1ebfn chuy\u1ec7n n\u00e0y qu\u00e1 nhi\u1ec1u l\u1ea7n \u1edf khu v\u1ef1c m\u00ecnh s\u1ed1ng. M\u1ed7i l\u1ea7n nh\u01b0 v\u1eady, t\u00f4i \u0111\u1ec1u t\u00ecm c\u00e1ch can thi\u1ec7p \u2013 kh\u00f4ng ch\u1ec9 v\u00ec t\u00f4i mu\u1ed1n b\u1ea3o v\u1ec7 ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef, m\u00e0 c\u00f2n v\u00ec t\u00f4i tin r\u1eb1ng nh\u1eefng ng\u01b0\u1eddi c\u00f3 h\u00e0nh vi b\u1ea1o l\u1ef1c th\u1ef1c ra c\u0169ng \u0111ang c\u1ea7n \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c gi\u00fap \u0111\u1ee1 \u0111\u1ec3 l\u1ea5y l\u1ea1i s\u1ef1 c\u00e2n b\u1eb1ng trong t\u00e2m l\u00fd c\u1ee7a h\u1ecd.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

🚗 H\u00f4m nay, khi t\u00f4i v\u00e0 ch\u1ed3ng \u0111ang tr\u00ean \u0111\u01b0\u1eddng v\u1ec1 nh\u00e0, ch\u00fang t\u00f4i b\u1eaft g\u1eb7p m\u1ed9t c\u1eb7p \u0111\u00f4i ngay tr\u01b0\u1edbc khu m\u00ecnh \u1edf. Ch\u00fang t\u00f4i d\u1eebng l\u1ea1i, quan s\u00e1t t\u00ecnh h\u00ecnh trong kho\u1ea3ng ba ph\u00fat. Ch\u00fang t\u00f4i quan s\u00e1t n\u00e9t m\u1eb7t, gi\u1ecdng n\u00f3i v\u00e0 th\u00e1i \u0111\u1ed9 c\u1ee7a h\u1ecd. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng \u0111\u1ee9ng s\u00e1t ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef, m\u1eaft tr\u1ee3n l\u00ean, m\u1eb7t c\u0103ng th\u1eb3ng, \u00e9p c\u00f4 \u1ea5y v\u00e0o t\u01b0\u1eddng. C\u00f4 \u1ea5y c\u00f3 v\u1ebb s\u1ee3 h\u00e3i, vai r\u1ee5t l\u1ea1i, ng\u01b0\u1eddi nghi\u00eang v\u1ec1 ph\u00eda sau, c\u1ed1 g\u1eafng \u00e1p l\u01b0ng v\u00e0o t\u01b0\u1eddng nh\u01b0 mu\u1ed1n b\u1ecf ch\u1ea1y.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

🤔 Ch\u00fang t\u00f4i nh\u00ecn nhau, x\u00e1c nh\u1eadn v\u1edbi nhau r\u1eb1ng m\u00ecnh \u0111ang kh\u00f4ng nh\u00ecn nh\u1ea7m, l\u00e0m qu\u00e1 t\u00ecnh h\u00ecnh, r\u1ed3i quy\u1ebft \u0111\u1ecbnh ra tay. T\u00f4i \u0111\u01b0a m\u1ea5y \u1ed5 b\u00e1nh m\u00ec \u0111ang c\u1ea7m cho ch\u1ed3ng \u0111\u1ec3 tay tr\u1ed1ng, th\u1ec3 hi\u1ec7n r\u1eb1ng t\u00f4i \u0111\u1ebfn v\u1edbi \u00fd \u0111\u1ecbnh h\u00f2a b\u00ecnh. T\u00f4i xu\u1ed1ng xe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ch\u00fang t\u00f4i th\u1ed1ng nh\u1ea5t r\u1eb1ng ch\u1ed3ng t\u00f4i s\u1ebd \u0111\u1ee9ng c\u00e1ch m\u1ed9t b\u01b0\u1edbc ch\u00e2n \u0111\u1ec3 v\u1eeba canh xe, v\u1eeba tr\u00e1nh khi\u1ebfn t\u00ecnh h\u00ecnh c\u0103ng th\u1eb3ng h\u01a1n. T\u00f4i h\u00edt th\u1edf s\u00e2u, l\u1eafng nghe c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 m\u00ecnh \u0111\u1ec3 gi\u1eef gi\u1ecdng n\u00f3i \u1edf m\u1ee9c b\u00ecnh t\u0129nh, t\u1ef1 nhi\u00ean nh\u1ea5t c\u00f3 th\u1ec3. T\u00f4i l\u00ean ti\u1ebfng h\u1ecfi h\u1ecd c\u00f3 c\u1ea7n gi\u00fap g\u00ec kh\u00f4ng, v\u00ec t\u00f4i th\u1ea5y h\u1ecd c\u00f3 v\u1ebb kh\u00f4ng \u1ed5n. C\u1ea3 hai \u0111\u1ec1u n\u00f3i \u201ckh\u00f4ng\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng l\u00f9i l\u1ea1i, c\u00f4 g\u00e1i ng\u1eebng \u00e9p m\u00ecnh v\u00e0o t\u01b0\u1eddng. T\u00f4i c\u0169ng l\u00f9i ra, l\u00ean xe, v\u00e0 ch\u00fang t\u00f4i r\u1eddi \u0111i trong khi v\u1eabn \u0111\u1ec3 m\u1eaft \u0111\u1ebfn h\u1ecd. Ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng kh\u00f4ng c\u00f2n \u0111e d\u1ecda c\u00f4 \u1ea5y n\u1eefa, nh\u01b0ng c\u1ea3 hai v\u1eabn \u0111\u1ee9ng \u0111\u00f3.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sau khi v\u1ec1 nh\u00e0, t\u00f4i th\u1ea5y bi\u1ebft \u01a1n v\u00ec c\u00f3 ch\u1ed3ng \u0111\u1ed3ng h\u00e0nh, c\u00f9ng nhau \u0111\u00e1nh gi\u00e1 t\u00ecnh hu\u1ed1ng v\u00e0 h\u1ed7 tr\u1ee3 l\u1eabn nhau. T\u00f4i c\u0169ng vui v\u00ec m\u00ecnh kh\u00f4ng b\u1ecb cu\u1ed1n v\u00e0o ph\u1ea3n \u1ee9ng \u201cchi\u1ebfn-bi\u1ebfn-\u0111\u00f4ng\u201d khi\u1ebfn t\u00f4i kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 can thi\u1ec7p hi\u1ec7u qu\u1ea3.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

💭 T\u00f4i c\u0169ng vui v\u00ec m\u00ecnh kh\u00f4ng b\u1ecb cu\u1ed1n v\u00e0o ph\u1ea3n \u1ee9ng \u201cchi\u1ebfn-bi\u1ebfn-\u0111\u00f4ng\u201d khi\u1ebfn t\u00f4i kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 can thi\u1ec7p hi\u1ec7u qu\u1ea3. Th\u1eadt ra, v\u1ec1 m\u1eb7t sinh h\u1ecdc, kh\u00f4ng ai c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 gi\u1ea3i quy\u1ebft t\u00ecnh hu\u1ed1ng t\u1ed1t khi h\u1ecd \u0111ang ho\u1ea3ng lo\u1ea1n ho\u1eb7c b\u1ecb k\u00edch \u0111\u1ed9ng, d\u00f9 h\u1ecd c\u00f3 h\u00e9t l\u00ean hay c\u1ed1 d\u00f9ng nh\u1eefng c\u00e2u n\u00f3i \u201cphi b\u1ea1o l\u1ef1c\u201d \u0111\u1ec3 can ng\u0103n \u0111i n\u1eefa.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

T\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 \u0111i m\u1ed9t ch\u1eb7ng \u0111\u01b0\u1eddng r\u1ea5t d\u00e0i \u0111\u1ec3 \u0111\u1ebfn \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u00e2y. T\u00f4i t\u1eebng h\u1ecdc c\u00e1c k\u1ef9 n\u0103ng giao ti\u1ebfp phi b\u1ea1o l\u1ef1c (NVC) qua h\u1ed9i th\u1ea3o v\u00e0 th\u1ef1c h\u00e0nh t\u00ecnh hu\u1ed1ng trong nhi\u1ec1u n\u0103m, nh\u01b0ng ph\u1ea3i m\u1ea5t r\u1ea5t l\u00e2u t\u00f4i m\u1edbi th\u1ef1c s\u1ef1 c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 \u00e1p d\u1ee5ng n\u00f3 hi\u1ec7u qu\u1ea3 trong th\u1ef1c t\u1ebf, nh\u1ea5t l\u00e0 v\u1edbi th\u00e2n ph\u1eadn m\u1ed9t ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef v\u00e0 m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi da m\u00e0u.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

📌 Ghi ch\u00fa: B\u00e0i vi\u1ebft n\u00e0y \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c vi\u1ebft v\u00e0o th\u00e1ng 9\/2018, khi t\u00f4i \u2013 Olga \u2013 v\u00e0 gia \u0111\u00ecnh v\u1eabn c\u00f2n s\u1ed1ng \u1edf Vi\u1ec7t Nam. V\u00ec nhi\u1ec1u l\u00fd do, bao g\u1ed3m c\u1ea3 c\u00e1c y\u1ebfu t\u1ed1 ngo\u00e0i t\u1ea7m ki\u1ec3m so\u00e1t, ch\u00fang t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 chuy\u1ec3n \u0111\u1ebfn Anh v\u00e0o n\u0103m 2021.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

📖 Ba \u0111i\u1ec1u c\u1ed1t l\u00f5i gi\u00fap t\u00f4i c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u00e0m \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111i\u1ec1u n\u00e0y:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1️⃣ Ch\u1eefa l\u00e0nh nh\u1eefng tr\u1ea3i nghi\u1ec7m \u0111au th\u01b0\u01a1ng trong qu\u00e1 kh\u1ee9 li\u00ean quan \u0111\u1ebfn b\u1ea1o l\u1ef1c m\u00e0 t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 ch\u1ee9ng ki\u1ebfn \u2013 hay c\u00f2n g\u1ecdi l\u00e0 \u201cl\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c v\u1edbi ch\u1ea5n th\u01b0\u01a1ng\u201d. Sarah Peyton c\u00f3 m\u1ed9t b\u1ea3n h\u01b0\u1edbng d\u1eabn r\u1ea5t hay v\u1ec1 v\u1ea5n \u0111\u1ec1 n\u00e0y trong cu\u1ed1n Your Resonant Self. N\u1ebfu kh\u00f4ng c\u00f3 qu\u00e1 tr\u00ecnh n\u00e0y, t\u00f4i s\u1ebd b\u1ecb cu\u1ed1n v\u00e0o ph\u1ea3n \u1ee9ng \u201c\u0111\u00f3ng b\u0103ng\u201d, b\u1ecb qu\u00e1 kh\u1ee9 tr\u00f3i bu\u1ed9c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2️⃣ X\u1eed l\u00fd nh\u1eefng r\u00e0ng bu\u1ed9c v\u00f4 th\u1ee9c m\u00e0 h\u1ec7 th\u1ea7n kinh c\u1ee7a t\u00f4i h\u00ecnh th\u00e0nh t\u1eeb thu\u1edf nh\u1ecf, ch\u1eb3ng h\u1ea1n nh\u01b0: \u201cKh\u00f4ng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c g\u00e2y chuy\u1ec7n\u201d, \u201cKh\u00f4ng \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111\u1ec3 ng\u01b0\u1eddi kh\u00e1c m\u1ea5t m\u1eb7t\u201d, \u201cPh\u1ea3i lo chuy\u1ec7n c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh th\u00f4i\u201d \u2013 hay c\u00f2n g\u1ecdi l\u00e0 \u201cl\u00e0m vi\u1ec7c v\u1edbi l\u1eddi th\u1ec1 v\u00f4 th\u1ee9c\u201d theo ph\u01b0\u01a1ng ph\u00e1p c\u1ee7a Sarah Peyton.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3️⃣ Nh\u1eadn th\u1ee9c v\u1ec1 c\u01a1 ch\u1ebf th\u1ea7n kinh c\u1ee7a m\u00ecnh v\u00e0 theo d\u00f5i c\u1ea3m gi\u00e1c c\u01a1 th\u1ec3 v\u00e0o ch\u00ednh th\u1eddi \u0111i\u1ec3m \u0111\u00f3 \u2013 \u0111\u1ec3 gi\u1eef nh\u1ecbp th\u1edf \u1ed5n \u0111\u1ecbnh, gi\u1ecdng n\u00f3i kh\u00f4ng b\u1ecb c\u0103ng th\u1eb3ng, khu\u00f4n m\u1eb7t th\u1ec3 hi\u1ec7n s\u1ef1 b\u00ecnh t\u0129nh v\u00e0 th\u00e2n thi\u1ec7n. N\u1ebfu kh\u00f4ng, d\u00f9 t\u00f4i c\u00f3 n\u00f3i \u0111\u00fang nh\u1eefng c\u00e2u \u0111\u00f3 nh\u01b0ng gi\u1ecdng cao ch\u00f3t v\u00f3t, m\u1eb7t m\u00e0y c\u0103ng th\u1eb3ng th\u00ec k\u1ebft qu\u1ea3 s\u1ebd r\u1ea5t kh\u00e1c .<\/p>\n\n\n\n

💡 Tin t\u00f4i \u0111i, t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 t\u1eebng th\u1ea5t b\u1ea1i kh\u00f4ng bi\u1ebft bao nhi\u00eau l\u1ea7n tr\u01b0\u1edbc khi l\u00e0m \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111i\u1ec1u n\u00e0y.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

📏 \u00c0, nh\u00e2n ti\u1ec7n, t\u00f4i cao 1m65 v\u00e0 n\u1eb7ng kho\u1ea3ng 50kg \u2013 k\u1ef9 n\u0103ng xoa d\u1ecbu xung \u0111\u1ed9t c\u1ee7a t\u00f4i t\u1ed1t h\u01a1n kh\u1ea3 n\u0103ng \u0111\u1ed5i \u0111\u01a1n v\u1ecb \u0111o l\u01b0\u1eddng \u0111\u1ea5y!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

V\u00e0 b\u1ea1n h\u00e3y nh\u1edb r\u1eb1ng, t\u00f4i \u0111ang s\u1ed1ng trong m\u1ed9t \u0111\u1ea5t n\u01b0\u1edbc m\u00e0:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

1️⃣ T\u00f4i kh\u00f4ng th\u1ec3 g\u1ecdi c\u00f4ng an \u0111\u1ec3 tr\u00ecnh b\u00e1o – b\u1ea1o l\u1ef1c gia \u0111\u00ecnh kh\u00f4ng b\u1ecb coi l\u00e0 ph\u1ea1m ph\u00e1p.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2️⃣ N\u1ebfu m\u1ed9t ng\u01b0\u1eddi \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng \u0111\u00e1nh ng\u01b0\u1eddi ph\u1ee5 n\u1eef m\u00e0 anh ta c\u00f3 quan h\u1ec7 (v\u1ee3, con g\u00e1i, b\u1ea1n g\u00e1i), x\u00e3 h\u1ed9i v\u00e0 gia \u0111\u00ecnh c\u00f3 xu h\u01b0\u1edbng \u0111\u1ee9ng v\u1ec1 ph\u00eda anh ta.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3️⃣ Ng\u01b0\u1eddi qua \u0111\u01b0\u1eddng c\u00f3 kh\u1ea3 n\u0103ng b\u00eanh v\u1ef1c \u0111\u00e0n \u00f4ng da tr\u1eafng h\u01a1n l\u00e0 b\u00eanh v\u1ef1c t\u00f4i .<\/p>\n\n\n\n

🙌 N\u1ebfu t\u00f4i c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u00e0m \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111i\u1ec1u n\u00e0y trong ho\u00e0n c\u1ea3nh nh\u01b0 th\u1ebf, th\u00ec b\u1ea1n c\u0169ng c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 \u2013 n\u1ebfu b\u1ea1n mu\u1ed1n.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

N\u1ebfu b\u1ea1n c\u00f3 nhi\u1ec1u \u201cquy\u1ec1n l\u1ef1c\u201d h\u01a1n t\u00f4i (cao h\u01a1n, n\u1eb7ng h\u01a1n, ho\u1eb7c s\u1ed1ng \u1edf m\u1ed9t n\u01a1i c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 g\u1ecdi c\u1ea3nh s\u00e1t khi c\u00f3 ng\u01b0\u1eddi b\u1ecb \u0111\u00e1nh, k\u1ec3 c\u1ea3 b\u1ea1n), b\u1ea1n c\u0169ng c\u00f3 th\u1ec3 l\u00e0m \u0111\u01b0\u1ee3c \u0111i\u1ec1u \u0111\u00f3. N\u1ebfu b\u1ea1n mu\u1ed1n.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

💬 B\u1ea1n c\u00f3 mu\u1ed1n kh\u00f4ng?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

#B\u1ea1oL\u1ef1cGia\u0110\u00ecnh #GiaoTi\u1ebfpPhiB\u1ea1oL\u1ef1c #XoaD\u1ecbuXung\u0110\u1ed9t #SarahPeyton #NVC #TraumaHealing #H\u1ecdcT\u1eebTh\u1ef1cT\u1ebf #IIT #Vi\u1ec7tNam2025<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026\u2026.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"🌟\" Today I managed to stick my nose into other people\u2019s business and de-escalate a conflict in the street. Want to know where? Want to know how? Read on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I live in Saigon, Vietnam. Here domestic violence is legal. \"🌍\" In my experience, people rarely step in to stop a woman being beaten up by a man. \"🌺\" Vietnam culture ranks as a high-power differential culture, as per Hofstede, whereby it is within cultural norms for the person of the \u201chigher rank\u201d (a man, a husband) to \u201cdiscipline\u201d the person of a \u201clower rank\u201d (a woman, a wife). \"👁\" You see some women walking around with “panda eyes” after they “walked into a door”. I have seen males looming over females, shouting at them, etc. \"🌸\" Talking to my female friends here, local and expat, they see it too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"🥀\" Very often, given the power differential (income, freedom to travel, status, also kind of relative impunity from police), Caucasian male expats here adopt the same stance towards Vietnamese females. I have witnessed it many times around where we live. \"🛡\" I interfere in those situations, to meet my needs for supporting everyone (as I believe that if folks have escalated to that stage, they may be sorely in need of support to help them to come back to calm alert), compassion and protection.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"💡\" Today, as my husband and I made our way back home, we saw these two people just outside the place where we live.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We hung back and observed what was going on for about three minutes – their facial expressions, tone of voice. The guy was looming over a woman, his eyes bulging, his face tense, backing her into the wall. Her face looked scared, her shoulders were hunched, she was leaning backward trying to press her back into the wall.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"✨\" We checked in with each other and decided we were not making it up, and chose to interfere.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"🌺\" We got closer to them. I passed on the baguettes I was carrying to my husband to show my hands were empty and I was coming in peace. \"💬\" I got off the bike – we agreed that my husband would stay a step behind to reduce the risks of further escalation – and to mind the bike. I breathed and tracked my body sensations to stay in the “non-threatening” social engagement chunk of my nervous system and help keep my voice in its prosody. \"🌿\" I asked whether anyone needed help as it seemed to me they looked upset. They both said \u201cno\u201d. The guy backed off from the woman. She stopped pressing into the wall. I backed off from them and got on the bike. \"🚴\" We drove off whilst looking at them. He seemed to have backed off and stopped looming throughout that time. \"😌\" They stayed there though.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"🧠\" Debriefing, I am grateful to have my husband who teamed up with me in assessing the situation and who was a witness that could debrief with me afterward. \"🌟\" I am also happy I did not swing into fight, flight or freeze where I’m not effective at interfering. Well, human biology makes it so that none of us humans are effective at de-escalating situations when we are in fight, flight or freeze, whether we are shouting or reaching for our best nonviolent \u201cscript.\u201d \"🌼\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"🌎\" It’s been a long road for me to get here from where I started. I knew what to say and what to do via NVC workshops and role-plays for many, many years before being able to do it in a way that de-escalates the situation – in this body that I have, as a woman and a person of color.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"💪\" Here\u2019s THREE things that have been pivotal for me to be able to do that:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"1️⃣\" Cleaning up various unintegrated life experiences related to the violence I witnessed: “trauma work”. Sarah Peyton gives the blueprint for it in her \u201cYour Resonant Self.\u201d Without it, I’d go into immobilization (“freeze”) with the past trauma.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"2️⃣\" Cleaning up various unconscious early nervous system contracts (like “thou shalt not make a fuss\u201d, \u201cthou shalt not make people lose face,\u201d “thou shalt mind thine own business\u201d): \u201csacred vow work\u201d by Sarah Peyton.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"3️⃣\" Awareness of my neurobiology and tracking my body and empathizing with it in real time to get the breathing back to diaphragmatic, the voice back to prosodic and the vagus nerve back to social engagement. Without it, me saying the same words in a high-pitched shrill voice, with more a strained vs relaxed\/calm alert facial expression, would have had a very different effect. \"🌷\" Trust me, I know – through many “failures” of trying to do it and not being able to.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"😄\" For the record, I’m 5’5 (165cms) and about 120 pounds on a good day (c.50 kgs – my powers of de-escalating situations are better than my powers of metric conversion \"🙂\" ).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"📏\" Keep in mind I am living in a country\/system where:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"1️⃣\" I can’t call the police due to legality of domestic violence;<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"2️⃣\" even if a male decides to beat up a female he is related to (a daughter, a wife, a girlfriend) , the social acceptance by society in general and extended family is in his favour;<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"3️⃣\" where passerbys are more likely to side with the Caucasian male than with me. See below WHY if interested*.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"🙌\" If I can do this here, YOU can do it too – IF you want to. So with that in mind\u2026 if you have more \u201cpower\u201d than me (you are taller, heavier, or live in a country where you can call the police when people are getting hit, yourself included, or can draw on the sense of \u201cmoral wrong\u201d within the person hitting or the other passers-by), you can do it too. If you want to.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"💬\" Do you?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Today I managed to stick my nose into other people\u2019s business and de-escalate a conflict in the street. Want to know where? Want to know how? Read on. [English below] B\u1ea1n c\u00f3 mu\u1ed1n bi\u1ebft chuy\u1ec7n x\u1ea3y ra \u1edf \u0111\u00e2u, v\u00e0 t\u00f4i \u0111\u00e3 l\u00e0m th\u1ebf n\u00e0o kh\u00f4ng? C\u00f9ng \u0111\u1ecdc ti\u1ebfp nh\u00e9! 🏠 T\u00f4i s\u1ed1ng \u1edf S\u00e0i […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":3126,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[61],"tags":[12,62],"class_list":["post-3125","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-iit-vietnam2025","tag-compassionate-communication","tag-vietnamiit2025"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3125","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3125"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3125\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3128,"href":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3125\/revisions\/3128"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3126"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3125"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3125"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.giaotieptracan.com\/vi\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3125"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}